They May Be Drunk But At Least Their Breath Smells Fresh

They May Be Drunk But At Least Their Breath Smells Fresh

Hand sanitizer contains ethanol (as much as 60-65% – that’s like 120 proof!) and can get you incredibly wasted very fast. It might also contain isopropyl alcohol (IPA), depending on the brand, which will get you twice as drunk twice as fast for twice as long. Fortunately drinking a bottle of IPA will most likely only make you vomit blood for awhile – it gives you pretty severe gastritis, unlike drinking Sterno which makes you go blind and can kill you or drinking antifreeze which knocks off your kidneys and then kills you. IPA and ethanol (the other alcohol we drink) is ubiquitous – its in everything but hand sanitizer has become a real problem. There are stories of little kids standing under hand sanitizer dispenser with their mouths open like hungry, drunken little birds waiting for the magical sticky goo to drop into onto their tongues.


Written by Poison Boy

Gerry O'Malley (a.k.a Poison Boy) is a board certified ER doctor and toxicologist with a interest in the unusual, terrifying and occasionally hilarious world of poisonings and toxicology. This site is an exploration of poisons of historical interest as well as in current events and pop culture.

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